Jane’s Tuna Salad (and a Vegan Chickpeas version too!)

My death row meal would be a tuna salad sandwich. Specifically the tuna salad sandwich from Neiman Marcus’s Mermaid Bar Cafe. It’s best ordered as the Mermaid Sampler: one half of a sky high tuna salad sandwich accompanied by a cup of tortilla soup, a fruit cup, potato chips, and an assortment of bean and corn relishes. It’s really retro. It even comes with a weird gelatinous poppy seed jam to dip your fruit in. When I was a kid sometimes my mom would let me and my sister play hooky at and skip school to go get lunch with her at the Mermaid Bar in Northpark Center. We’d all get the Mermaid Sampler and then share a huge slice of cake afterwards, coconut if they had it. 

To this day, my favorite remedy for a bad mood is a tuna salad sandwich from the Mermaid Bar. It makes me feel deeply satisfied and deliriously happy. I’ve been craving them a lot lately, so I’ve been making tuna salad at home. My recipe is entirely dissimilar to the Mermaid Bar’s-theirs stands on its own and mine would just not be the same even if I tried. Besides, if I was always eating the Mermaid Bar tuna salad at home, it wouldn’t feel special to me when I actually go there and order it. Why would I want to ruin one of my favorite things on the planet?? 

I’ve tweaked my recipe a lot over the last few weeks and this is the variation I like the most. It is heavy on the pickles, it uses curry and dill, and it’s got a lot of crunch. I only use part mayonnaise in this. Actually, that’s a lie. I use Vegenaise in my tuna salad! I am not a big of mayo will go out of my way to avoid using it as much as possible. This tuna salad uses only part mayo and mostly greek yogurt for creaminess. It’s my go-to desk lunch lately. I’ll cover some rice cakes with a mountain of tuna salad and scarf them down while I answer emails around noon. It’s also delicious on saltines, eaten in bed while you watch a show. Food always tastes better when your watching TV, I don’t know why.

I have included a vegan non-tuna salad recipe because it was just too easy not too. I have many vegetarian friends to think of. While you are mincing your shallots and pickles and celery for the tuna salad, why not double down and make a batch of both? During my three month stint as a vegan this year I missed my tuna salad horribly. This chickpea version of a tuna salad was a delicious stand in, I think you will like it as much as I do.

My death row meal would be a tuna salad sandwich. Specifically the tuna salad sandwich from Neiman Marcus’s Mermaid Bar Cafe. It’s best ordered as the Mermaid Sampler: one half of a sky high tuna salad sandwich accompanied by a cup of tortilla soup, a fruit cup, potato chips, and an assortment of bean and corn relishes. It’s really retro. It even comes with a weird gelatinous poppy seed jam to dip your fruit in. When I was a kid sometimes my mom would let me and my sister play hooky at and skip school to go get lunch with her at the Mermaid Bar in Northpark Center. We’d all get the Mermaid Sampler and then share a huge slice of cake afterwards, coconut if they had it. 

To this day, my favorite remedy for a bad mood is a tuna salad sandwich from the Mermaid Bar. It makes me feel deeply satisfied and deliriously happy. I’ve been craving them a lot lately, so I’ve been making tuna salad at home. My recipe is entirely dissimilar to the Mermaid Bar’s-theirs stands on its own and mine would just not be the same even if I tried. Besides, if I was always eating the Mermaid Bar tuna salad at home, it wouldn’t feel special to me when I actually go there and order it. Why would I want to ruin one of my favorite things on the planet??